i loathe this!!!!!!!!!!!!

fuck last night. it was a disaster.. im so embaressed and so upset with myself. the xmas brittany beast came out and i hate hate hate hate hate hate myself when i'm like that. i was so mean, so drunk, so out of control. i was everything im normally not and it's the worst. i hate knowing that people gave up their time to take care of me even tho i appreciate it so much. i love jenna and emily and john- you guys mean so much to me. ugh 2 people led me to say/do the things i did last night... and i think i learned that there are some people that are always gunna hate/never forgive so im just going to accept that about them. thaz very narrow-minded but im guilty of it myself when it comes to a few paticular people.. nobody's perfect. not even u.